Getting to This Point...

       Hello to all of you who have decided to take an interest in my blog! I'm using this blog as my diet journal in an effort to keep myself motivated during the process. I will try to write everyday/every other day when I can find time. During the next month or so I will be sharing my hardships in attempting to lose weight and sticking to a strict weight loss plan. Hopefully, I will also be sharing my positive experiences during my journey as well! :)

        I want to begin by sharing some background with you and why I decided to go on a diet and start a blog. I have struggled with my weight since 5th grade. Even though I was continually dancing, I kept increasing in size. It was always difficult to stand in the dance studio in a leotard and be the biggest one in the room. When I was fifteen I went into a deep depression. One of the side effects of being depressed was losing my appetite. My need to be away from everyone caused me to begin running multiple times a day. Between living off of several bites here and there and continually running, I was able to lose 30 lbs in a very short amount of time. While I stayed in my depression I was able to keep off the weight, but once I became myself again and started eating, I gained all my weight back within a few months. I am now 19 and I have gained 60 lbs since I was 16, I am overweight. I lived (continually live in) and grew up in a house where we did not eat out often and we rarely had junk food such as potato chips and soda. I've been very fortunate to grow up with a mom who cooked nutritious home-cooked meals every night. There was always a protein, vegetable/fruit, and salad at the dinner table. I am not a couch potato. I dance when I can fit it into my schedule and I walk and chase kids around at work all day. My main problem over the years has been the fact that I eat too much. When there is food in front of me, I will eat it, even if I don't necessarily like the taste or am not hungry. Also, between juggling my work, school, and social life I end up grabbing whatever I can to eat, which most of the time is not a healthy choice. I definitely don't pig out, but after a while all those extra helpings and grab and go meals add up. I gained the weight slowly and steadily, until one day I realized that I didn't like the way I felt about my body or the way I looked in pictures or clothes. That was quite some time ago. Since then, I have tried eating less, and dancing/exercising 9 hours a week. I lost a little and then hit a plateau. This semester I don't have much time to exercise so I know I've gained back some of the weight. I'm tired of wasting my energy on hating the way I look and comparing myself to skinny girls. If I don't make a drastic change now, the scale will keep rising and it will only become harder to reach a healthy weight. I have tried doing unplanned diets on my own, which have always ended up in miserable failures. This time around, I bought a diet plan called HCG to follow and am writing this blog so that I won't fall by the wayside and give up. 

          My goal during this journey to a healthier me, is to love my body and feel comfortable in clothes that I want to wear. No more hiding in big baggy t-shirts and sweatshirts! I by no means want to be "model" skinny. I love curves, they make women beautiful. Bring on the hips, thighs and butt! I am not going to set a goal weight. Instead, my focus will be on slimming down in general, until I like...no, LOVE how I feel. I also want to create a healthy relationship between myself and food by picking up good eating habits for the long-run.

        As I am waiting for my diet plan to arrive in the mail, (which should be tomorrow!), I have been trying to prepare by getting supplies, doing research, and trying not to psych myself out. I plan on starting my first day on Saturday. Tomorrow, I will try to find time to explain the HCG diet and what it entails.